I fucking hate that poxy T-mobile ad with that stupid curly haired fucktwit and his “band”.

I don’t care about you or your wanky band and i sure as fuck aint gonna look you up on twatter you little fuckpig. And his name would be Josh, only cunts and annoying wankers are called Josh. I hate fuckers and their non entity bands, the sort of pricks who carry their guitars around in case someone fancies a sing-along in the pub or park you egotistical overblown egomaniacal bunches of utter wastes of space.

Take your untalented selves and all your bastard mates and fuck right off to hell you ugly bunch of shitslags.

(What’s that? it’s only an advert? Oh i see, sorry but you get the point. I bet josh has a band in real life the scabby ugly fucking little prick.)

A very INconvenient product

As a British citizen, I thought I should bring this to your attention as I feel it is quite an interesting issue.

I have had a couple of incidents with a new milk product called Dairystix. I say only a couple as I wasn’t prepared to use them again afterwards! If you are not sure what I mean they are an alternative to the little plastic pots you get on trains/in service stations etc. Shaped like sugar sticks but with plastic packaging they contain a portion of milk to put into your tea/coffee etc. Despite the not-so-helpful hint on the pack to ‘tear off here’, the milk squirted out of the tube and all down my clothing, over shooting my cup by a mile. On the second occasion the milk still went everywhere and the ripped off top fell in my drink forcing me to put my fingers in scalding tea – which is not what you need on a Monday morning!.

This is not just some aimless rant, I am not the only person who feels this way. After encountering such irresponsible engineering I had a hunt on the net to find out if it really was just me. It turns out that I am not alone. On YouTube I found 3 videos of people documenting their disastrous experiences with Dairystix – all of them ending up covered in milk, for example:

If someone has an issue with anything you are bound to find something about it on Facebook and this is true when it comes to Dairystix. Search for ‘Campaign to get Dairystix banned from all office environments’.

There is even a petition on Number 10’s website to abolish the “modern menace” that is Dairystix. However, it is apparently not in the Prime Ministers power to do anything about, so sadly it was rejected, but still displayed on the website.

A rather interesting point is raised when it comes to their environmental efforts. On the newer packaging, Dairystix states, “50% less packaging than plastic pots”. While this may be correct in terms of amount of packaging used it is not really an advantage as none of it is recyclable. The plastic pots on the other hand are fully recyclable apart from the foil lid. So in terms of what ends up on the landfill, there is going to be more space taken up by Dairystix packaging than plastic pots! Not the message you get from the Dairystix website I might add!

Anyway I feel I have vented my spleen and just wanted to highlight this issue others. If it is in your power to bring it to the attention of a wider audience I would urge you to do so!

Listening to my ipod on the bus..

Right.. This is rant number fucking 3 today.. Im gonna keep it short and not so sweet.

This morning, I got on the bus and was listening to my ipod, as I always do. This old bastard of a woman who was sitting at least 3 seats in front of me obviously had a problem with this. So, she kept shaking her head, turning around and giving me dirty looks… Oh sorry love, do you want me to turn it down or off maybe? err.. how about fuck you! Sorry, but its not my problem if you find the sound of my ipod annoying.. fucking deal with it! Acting like that, your certainly not going to get what you want! God I hate them, if I want to listen to my ipod, I fucking will and no stupid old cow like that is going to stop me!! And just for the record, I didnt have it on full blast. These people really piss me off.. bloody hell, I cant stand these chavs who like to play music out loud on their mobile phones whilst walking down the high st or something, but do you see me shaking my head at them.. Jesus Fucking Christ. Im sorry to say this but its always OAP’s that have the problem…

Bus Drivers!

Rant 4 of the day! There’s almost nothing I detest more than having a dickhead bus driver. So there I was, getting on the bus heading home. I give him some change for the fair which is 5p over, and what does the bastard say? “At least give me the right amount of money. ” As if i'm going to fucking spare you the trauma of using your brain for five seconds to work out that you owe me 5 pence. As if I give a shit about you and your miserable job. The whole reason you’re a bus driver is probably because you failed all of your GCEs in school, and the only thing you did pass was either how to drive or a turd! For fucks sake it’s only 5p. Work it the hell out you ignorant shit. If you’re going to be a prick about it, then i’m going to hand you a £50 note next time and let you work that out.